Sunday, March 30, 2008

New Zealand Man Buggered by Wombat?

AP: A New Zealand man has been sentenced to community service after telling police he had been raped by a wombat and the experience had caused him to start speaking "Australian..." Read the shocking Story

It is believed that the wombat was acting alone in this case, and was not part of a larger conspiracy against mankind in general. We will be tracking this new form of terror closely, and the Dept. of Homeland Security may institute a separate "Wombat Security Advisory System" ranging from green safety to red terror.

Deputy Press Secretary Tony Fratto added that the President will also consider creating a new "Wombat Czar" position in his cabinet.

*Cat owners were quick to point out that Wombats originally diverged from canines some 50 million years ago in the evolutionary tree, and have no relation whatsoever to felines.

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