The terror alert level was raised to "Gray" today, after it was reported that one or more dogs have been attacked by terrorist squirrels.According to Dick Cheney, these squirrels may be affiliated with the "radical" community organization, ACORN, and may be the SAME unpatriotic squirrels that have reportedly been stealing American Flags from a Michigan cemetary, although critics insist that there is no evidence to suggest that the events are related.
The attack happened shortly after President Obama made a speech addressing Middle Eastern leaders from Egypt, although it is not known if the events are related.
After making the accusations, Dick Cheney quickly returned to his Washington DC area bunker.
"The Squirrels hate us for our freedom" say off-leash dogs.
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